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This morning I went to the gym (which in and of itself is a random act) and brought my new favorite book How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie.  As I sat down to do some sit ups, a man asked me why I was reading this book.

Not needing an excuse to avoid doing crunches, I sat up, smiled and said, “because I am an entrepreneur and a mom and any effective leadership techniques I can get my hands on are as good as gold.”  Well, that was all that this guy needed to forego his workout and get involved in a random conversation.

This simple question spawned an hour-long chat about business, finances, leadership, randomness and what to do now to prepare for making a big chunk of cash in the future.  I now have a new group of books to add to my reading list and the world grew smaller yet again when this guy dropped the name of a company that belonged to a woman I incubated with at Ladies Who Launch.

Random conversation, random place to get into this conversation and even more random that this guy knew my friend who I hadn’t spoken to in a while.  So, when I got back to my desk it was time to shoot off an email to said long lost friend and send a random hello.

Back to the book that I am reading and why it is my new favorite book…  How to Win Friends & Influence People was written in 1936 by Dale Carnegie.  This book has been mentioned in hundreds of business books and articles over the past seventy plus years.  I am sure you have heard the title, right?  But have you ever picked this book up and read the little gem?  If not, add it to your bucket list.  This thing is packed full of great advice for MOMPRENEURS!

And every single lesson is just as poignant today as it was seventy years ago!  Lesson #1: Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.  Wow, those are some pretty interesting words from a man in the 1930’s and the beauty is that they really aren’t anything that we don’t already know.  The reason that they inspired me to write a post about them is because of the reasoning behind them.

People do not do what we want them to do when we criticize them because we put them on the defense.  Mass murderers, dirty politicians and naughty kids all have a justification in their minds for committing their crimes.  This is human nature and it will not change.

So, if you want to motivate (or manipulate, depending on how you look at it) people to do what you want, you have to think strategically!  The key is making them WANT to do the thing that you want them to do.  This can be applied to our kids, our team, our friends and family and even the random stranger who keeps you from doing your crunches.  Criticizing, complaining and condemning anything will have a negative reflection on us.  There is no way around it.

The moral of this post is… if we want to accomplish great things, we must accept, embrace and creatively encourage those around us.  In turn, we will go farther faster, with more enjoyment and with a greater level of support.

I know… kind of a random message for a Monday morning, but a pretty powerful one to kick off the week!

Next book… Fooled By Randomness by Nassim Nicholas Taleb.

A lot of moms are afraid that if they start a business, they will lose their relationships or somehow things will be hard.  I am here to tell you that there are 3 simple things you can do right now to make sure that your business will be great for your relationships.  Watch this video and leave your comments below if you have any additions or thoughts.

There are certain choices you can make as a mom and an entrepreneur that will really move you ahead of the crowd and other decisions that will set you back significantly.  If you want to accelerate your growth rate, there is a simple solution: pick up a book regularly.  Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t read every single night, but 5 nights a week for 15 minutes will get you through at least 7 books listed below within a few months.  I guarantee it will be worth your time. The must-reads are in bold, the titles are listed in random order but these are all great books for mom business owners.

I have read (or at least skimmed) all of the books listed below and found a significant amount of value in each.  Experience has taught me that it is good form to know details about the books that people talk about.  Every book on this list has come up in conversation at least once in my networking history.  So, consider this your social studies lesson for the day. 

**BTW, none of these links below are affiliate links and I am in no way being compensated or requested to list these books.  That said, I recommend clicking on the link of whatever book calls loudest to you and either checking it out of the library or adding it to your entrepreneurial book collection today.  Enjoy!

1. Book Yourself Solid by Michael Port
2. A Whole New Mind by Daniel Pink
3. The Mary Kay Way by Mary Kay Ash
4. Seducing the Boys Club by Nina DiSesa
5. The Elements of Great Public Speaking by J. Lyman MacInnis
6. The Accidental Entrepreneur by Susan Urquhart-Brown
7. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
8. The Millionaire Mind by Thomas J. Stanley
9. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill
10. Secrets of Millionaire Moms: Learn How They Turned Great Ideas Into Booming Businesses by Tamara Monosoff
11. The Toilet Paper Entrepreneur by Mike Michalowicz
12. Reality Check: The Irreverent Guide to Outsmarting, Outmanaging, and Outmarketing Your Competition by Guy Kawasaki
13. The E-Myth Revisited: Why Most Small Businesses Don’t Work and What to Do About It by Michael E. Gerber
14. The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss
15. Wear Clean Underwear: A Fast, Fun, Friendly and Essential Guide to Legal Planning for Busy Parents by Alexis Martin Neely
16. Ambition is Not a Dirty Word by Debra Condren
17. Nice Girls Don’t Get Rich: 75 Avoidable Mistakes Women Make with Money by Lois P. Frankel
18. Ask For It: How Women Can Use the Power of Negotiation to Get What They Really Want by Linda Babcock
19. The Secret Handshake: Mastering the Politics of the Business Inner Circle by Kathleen Kelly Reardon Ph.D.
20. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
21. The Secret Code of Success by Noah St. John
22. Secrets of the Safety Goddess: A Modern Safety Guide for Busy Parents by Britt Michaelian, M.A. (sorry, had to do it.)

If you have any additions, subtractions or reactions to this list, by all means, please chime in below!

my hubby and I (photo by White Rabbit Studios)

As a mom and an entrepreneur, one of the biggest hurdles I have had to overcome (and am still battling every now and again) was to get my husband to not only be on the same page as me, but to support my entrepreneurial dreams with his whole heart. In order to reach a fulfilling level of success in my business and personal life, it is important to me that my husband and children all understand and appreciate what I do, why I do it and why it benefits the people I serve.  However, what I learned is that getting my spouse to support my dreams had more to do with me than him.

My husband is a great guy and has been an entrepreneur himself for many years, but on some levels, I think he expected me to stay home and focus on the family just like his mom did.  Being a stay at home mom simply wasn’t in the cards for me, not because my mom wasn’t a career maven or because I don’t love my kids more than anything else in the world, she was and I do!  But because I have found my life purpose and I believe that my children benefit from seeing their mother follow her dreams.

I know what you may be thinking… “This chick has everything figured out, so why is she writing about needing support?”  Well, I have to tell you for a long time, my husband thought he was supporting me, but he was still coming home from working all day at his company, frustrated that he was the only one who was significantly contributing financially and to him, it seemed like all I was doing was spending the money that he earned to try to run a company that he didn’t understand.  On top of that, sometimes it just takes time before your business starts to turn a profit.  My husband’s business turned a profit immediately of course.

His business was buying and selling used networking gear.  Supply was low and demand was high when he and his business partner launched the company.  He knew that if he bought a router for a certain amount, he could flip it for a 20% or more gain.  The margins were high and the business didn’t require a ton of manpower to run.  It is a simple business model, buy one thing and sell it for more to turn a profit.  What I was selling was my intellectual property.  People buy things from people they know, like and trust, so I needed to build my reputation before the profits would come rolling in.

With my business, I was selling $20 DVDs and speaking for very little money leading child safety workshops.  With that business model, he was right.  I would never be contributing significantly to the family bank account unless I got on Oprah or the Today Show and even then it wasn’t a guarantee.  I was just covering my own costs and paying someone else to help me manage my kids and the house.  The numbers weren’t adding up and I could see that.  So, I had to readjust my business model to create wealth, which was exactly what my husband needed to see to put his faith in my entrepreneurial dreams.

If you have a partner who isn’t giving you 100% of the support that you need to pursue your dreams, here are 3 things you can do to help earn their faith in you and your vision:

1.  Create a 1-page document that details who you are, what you do, why you are the best person to do this work and how it will benefit your clients. First, outline your top 5 personal values, strengths and weaknesses and how these apply to your business.  Next, explain the type of work that you want to do and why it is important to you.  Last, explain how your products or services will benefit the clients who use them and what you envision your ultimate vision to entail.  Be clear about if you want to sell the business in a few years for a hefty number or keep it going indefinitely as an income source.  Finally, laminate or frame this document and place it in your workspace after explaining it to your partner!

2.  Spreadsheets are your friend when it comes to numbers peeps like my husband!  In truth, spreadsheets are extremely important not just to give others a glimpse into your financial reality, but for you to run your business with a clear picture of the money that goes out every month, how much comes in and your projections of these figures in the future.

Design this spreadsheet to reflect your monthly revenue, expenses and goals so you have a system to keep track of where you are, where you have been and where you are going with your company’s finances.  Update this sheet every month and reevaluate it monthly with your bookkeeper and twice annually with your CPA.  You also want to give your partner a clear idea about when he or she will see a return on the investment into the business and when you will start generating monthly revenue.

3.  If you want support, you need to be supportive. Period.  You can’t expect what you don’t give yourself.  It’s time to open the lines of communication not just with your partner, but with your entire family about what their goals and dreams are and how you can support each other in your efforts to achieve success.  Make a concerted effort to sit down at the beginning of every week as a family and talk about where you are on your journey and what needs to happen to get you where you want to go.

These tips are not only important in helping you to gain the support of your loved ones, they are just as essential for your own confidence and understanding about you, your business, your finances and your vision.  By having a firm grasp on the whole picture of why you are doing the work you are doing and how you will monetize that dream, you will be able to make the best choices to get you where you want to go faster, with a higher level of fulfillment and with enough support to move mountains.  Believe in yourself and everyone else will have no choice but to believe in you too!

Bio:

Britt Michaelian, M.A. is an exhibiting artist, an award-winning filmmaker, a bestselling author and a serial entrepreneur dedicated to helping moms find and follow their life purpose.  To sign up for the free Work Smart Mompreneurs newsletter and get a free Productivity Powerhouse ebook go to http://WorkSmartMompreneurs.com